♥
Sunday, July 31, 2005
PISSING OFF would be goodDear mister _______,
Do NOT say anything.Do NOT do anything.Because they'll just be meaningless.NO WAIT.You hardly even say a word or do anything.
And that's the bloody problem.I swear I'd shoot you for that if it wasn't sinful or illegal.
I'm assuming that you felt obliged to meet that day.I'm assuming that you sympathise with me.I'm assuming that you actually don't give a rat's ass about me,or anything else pertaining me.Yes,as much as i loathe it,I'm filled with assumptions.Because mister..that's the
only thing I CAN do.
ASSUME.
It's not as if I forced you.A 'No' would have been good,saving the plastic smiles.I'd rather you just came up saying "Fuck off",than you pretend as if I still meant something(or anything for that matter).You could have lived your life and I could pretend as if you already migrated
or died,leaving both of us happy.At least,for you.
Why leave me pondering what's the aftermath gonna be like?Maybe this is one-sided you say,but it's not as if I didn't ask your opinion.I DID.I've lost count of the number of times,that multiplying my toes and fingers by 65749746132481348732,wouldn't be enough.
I have not forgiven myself for what I did to you and am clueless as to whether you've done that.But if this is sweet revenge for you,then begone.I got hurt as well and you're just rubbing salt into the wound.THANKYOUVERYMUCH.I tried to make up for it,but it's oblivious to you.Now,I'm at the brink of
fill-in-the-blank.I'm wasting my precious time on someone,who finds it oh-so-hard to acknowledge me.It should have been given to those,who love and appreciate me.It's time to shut my gap and piss off,and pray that you come to around.And maybe say something.
Yours truly,
tha vain Selfless
♥
Saturday, July 30, 2005
i'm deprived of :
1. hugs&kisses
2. clothes
3.
more hugs&kisses4. songs on the comp
5. NETBALL
sponsers,givers and those who are willing to waste your time and love on me are most WELCOME.
♥
Friday, July 29, 2005
i deleted the previous entry,since it's righteous place is in my diary.the other diary,you dickhead.
I've absolutely no clue whatsoever as to what's been going on.What's going on around me,what's going on in my pretty lil' head.The next time you want to say something stupid/nonsensical/lame,say it slowly and maybe 2m away from me.So that I could process the utmost detail in the stupid/nonsensical/lame sentence/s that comes out of your mouth.And then maybe reward you with a rolling-my-eyes/sarcastic laugh/"shut up la".If you're unlucky that I don't get it,it could be because i'm too engrossed in my thoughts.or your stupidity.
♥
Wednesday, July 27, 2005
i wanna do LOADS of stuff.
and they're all pretty random stuff.
1. i wanna play NETBALL.
2. i wanna sing the elmo song.
3. i wanna star-gaze.
4. i wanna go roller-blading.
5. i wanna hug/kiss/both someone.anyone.
6. i wanna play in the sand.
7. i wanna get drenched and play in the rain.
8. i wanna dance all night.
9. i wanna finish to #10.
10. i wanna have some me-time.
♥
Tuesday, July 26, 2005
with hatred,to my bestfriend:)it amazes me how a change so little,can make such a big impression on my perception of a person.it amazes me how everyone has changed,ever since we've stepped out of that old junk in old airport road.it amazes me how people treat others ever since then.i've even amazed myself.it pays to be more vain,and i swear by that.i look at people differently these days.we still are the same bunch of people,but with..an edge?i don't know.but i appreciate every single one of you.because however you've affected me(good or bad),it's made me who i am today.and i love me,though not to the extent whereby it's self-admiration.love yourself and it makes it easier to love anyone else.
♥
no plastic smiles.thinking about the very special day,could make me tear right now.i'm overjoyed.overjoyed at the love and care of every single one.i might not have met many,but a simple message from one was good enough.remembering,was good enough.i'm touched.Deeply.i realised how many people actually care.i realised how much i was loved.there no longer are the days whereby,i think as to when my one-winged angel's gonna come.no longer the days of loneliness.no longer days of self-pity.
she's loved.and she couldn't be happier.thank you to all.every single one.
those i met,those well-wishes,
those for just even remembering.
with warmth,love,hugs and kisses..
Love Nis.
♥
Monday, July 25, 2005
she's oh so sassy.
and she's seventeen.
♥
Sunday, July 24, 2005
it's about 3hours and 10minutes before i become
the Queen for the day.smiles widely.everyone,please give me a hug/a kiss/both when you see me.i'm deprived of all that.shall i pen down all my wishes?now now.if you don't intend to give anything,i suggest you close the window now.
the Queen's wants:
1. mp3/zen/ipod
2. pale yellow Rusty tee(from parkway)
3. Rusty blue lanyard(from parkway)
4. more clothes(esp retro/vintage.skirts/tees/pants)
5. shoes/slips
6. more earrings(any kind.chandelier/buttons/hoops etc)
7. matt lipgloss/nude colour lipsticks
8. bouquet of red+white roses/a stalk of any or both
9. you could also give me money to buy the above(yes,nis has no shame)
10. OR,you could just wet me with kisses and warm me with cuddles.
then again,you all have been great.presents would just compliment the year.and notice how the first 5 are expensive shit,whilst the rest are em..cheap-
er.
♥
Tuesday, July 19, 2005
i shall "indulge" in cliche love quotes and TRY to make myself feel oh-so-better.OK?
♥
Monday, July 18, 2005
you wanna be
just friends?FINE.
then
ACT like one.
stop giving me bullshit.
he acted as if he cared,
but all he did was talked.
because when she dared,
he didn't say anything and walked.
sweet nothings spoken.
empty promises taken.thankyou.
THANKYOUVERYMUCH.
♥
Sunday, July 17, 2005
to you:
Do
NOT touch me.
I meant it when i said that to you.Besides my boyfriend and my best friend (who's melvyn m. chong),I do not let any other guy touch me.It goes especially to you.Because you think it's ok and that i'm comfortable with it.Well here's something.I'm
not.I don't have a grudge whatsoever,I just feel uncomfortable.So please,know your limits.Doesn't mean you're a friend,you can "be all comfortable".
on a lighter note,i've been a bit better.Physically.Overall?let's just say i might go into hibernation.and when that day comes,i
might just go out and party my HOT ass off.yes,i just complimented my own arse.it's called "boosting my confidence".so sue me.
♥
Wednesday, July 13, 2005
i ought to get sick often,because everyone misses me more.then again,everyone misses me but ___.i want his cuddles.i want his very lame yet funny jokes.i want his funny acts.i want him.I MISS YOU.and i miss my school friends.and i know you all miss me too,because i heard it from dan.don't worry.i'm coming back tomorrow.heh.yes..she's being child-like happy now.
and alot of things made me happy today.
1. i saw ELMO.he was singing to the tune of jingle bells with only one word,"sky".
2. RETRO was the style today.i dunno why i'm tlling,but this makes me happy.
3.the last 30mins of tuition was a laughing blast.
4. i talked to shaz and nana.
5. mummy bought a delifrance fruit-tart for me (ok.i'm just trying to make it 5).
i'm just feeling goooooooddd today.thought i'm sick.
hold me.
and let your soft lips touch mine.
love me.
and let my heart touch yours.
♥
Sunday, July 10, 2005
i'm sorry we met that day.
i'm sorry i hold your hand that day.
i'm sorry for trying to make you understand.
i'm sorry i care and bothered about you.
i'm sorry for saying those 3words.
i'm sorry for acknowledging your existence.
another comes,
yet all i want is you.
i wish you knew,
this love that's so true.
♥
Friday, July 08, 2005
sometimes a letting go a little helps.
sometimes crying for no reason helps.
sometimes letting your feelings loose helps.
sometimes..
well sometimes,we just have to do things we don't usually do.
i pray you understood every word.
and that finally everything's gonna be ok.
i'll love you.whole-heartedly.
because you're the perfect amount of simplicity.
♥
Wednesday, July 06, 2005
I WILL CRY ALL THE FUCKING TEARS I WANT.
AND I
DON'T NEED A FUCKING REASON FOR IT.
I REPEAT,
I
DON'T NEED A FUCKING REASON.
call me vulnerable.
call me weak.
call me hopeless.
call me a pathetic romatic.
say and do what you want.
BECAUSE I DON'T FUCKING CARE.
I DON'T.
and Boy,i miss you.so badly.
♥
Monday, July 04, 2005
nabeicheebyemuthafuckingbastard.
OK.that was plain "anger management".
i don't know what's up,but i just give up.
tired of bull.tired of thinking.
SIMPLE INDULGENCE is all i want.
but nooooo.everything's so confusing or made confusing.
tsk.FUCK OFF.fuckfuckfuck.
and my head's spinning.ugh.
this is sooo a "rant+rave".
pzyko;
Appreciate is the key word.and yep,goondu friends.
mary ann; there Are onion breads?i'll tell my friend.HAH.and everything WILL go fine,just that right now i'mto tired/lazy to deal with issues.
♥
Sunday, July 03, 2005
Appreciate 5 things before 5 others:
1. Your Youth before Your Old Age
2. Your Health before Your Illness
3. Your Wealth before Your Poverty
4. Your Spare Time before Your Difficult Time
5. Your Life before Your Death
on a lighter note,
the conversation between Fuad and FarhanFarhan:"Mushrooms (and tomatoes) suck."
Fuad:"Mushrooms are nice la."
Farhan:"Onions ward off evil."
Fuad,innocently says:"I thought it was garlic."
Farhan:"They're both the same la.They're both roots."
Fuad:"No,they're not.There's garlic bread,but there isn't onion bread."
Farhan,now defensive:"There is la.One day,I'll show you."
yes,it doesn't really sound very amusing.but i was just VERY amused by fuad's innocence.i laughed so hard.
♥
Sunday, July 31, 2005
PISSING OFF would be goodDear mister _______,
Do NOT say anything.Do NOT do anything.Because they'll just be meaningless.NO WAIT.You hardly even say a word or do anything.
And that's the bloody problem.I swear I'd shoot you for that if it wasn't sinful or illegal.
I'm assuming that you felt obliged to meet that day.I'm assuming that you sympathise with me.I'm assuming that you actually don't give a rat's ass about me,or anything else pertaining me.Yes,as much as i loathe it,I'm filled with assumptions.Because mister..that's the
only thing I CAN do.
ASSUME.
It's not as if I forced you.A 'No' would have been good,saving the plastic smiles.I'd rather you just came up saying "Fuck off",than you pretend as if I still meant something(or anything for that matter).You could have lived your life and I could pretend as if you already migrated
or died,leaving both of us happy.At least,for you.
Why leave me pondering what's the aftermath gonna be like?Maybe this is one-sided you say,but it's not as if I didn't ask your opinion.I DID.I've lost count of the number of times,that multiplying my toes and fingers by 65749746132481348732,wouldn't be enough.
I have not forgiven myself for what I did to you and am clueless as to whether you've done that.But if this is sweet revenge for you,then begone.I got hurt as well and you're just rubbing salt into the wound.THANKYOUVERYMUCH.I tried to make up for it,but it's oblivious to you.Now,I'm at the brink of
fill-in-the-blank.I'm wasting my precious time on someone,who finds it oh-so-hard to acknowledge me.It should have been given to those,who love and appreciate me.It's time to shut my gap and piss off,and pray that you come to around.And maybe say something.
Yours truly,
tha vain Selfless
♥
Saturday, July 30, 2005
i'm deprived of :
1. hugs&kisses
2. clothes
3.
more hugs&kisses4. songs on the comp
5. NETBALL
sponsers,givers and those who are willing to waste your time and love on me are most WELCOME.
♥
Friday, July 29, 2005
i deleted the previous entry,since it's righteous place is in my diary.the other diary,you dickhead.
I've absolutely no clue whatsoever as to what's been going on.What's going on around me,what's going on in my pretty lil' head.The next time you want to say something stupid/nonsensical/lame,say it slowly and maybe 2m away from me.So that I could process the utmost detail in the stupid/nonsensical/lame sentence/s that comes out of your mouth.And then maybe reward you with a rolling-my-eyes/sarcastic laugh/"shut up la".If you're unlucky that I don't get it,it could be because i'm too engrossed in my thoughts.or your stupidity.
♥
Wednesday, July 27, 2005
i wanna do LOADS of stuff.
and they're all pretty random stuff.
1. i wanna play NETBALL.
2. i wanna sing the elmo song.
3. i wanna star-gaze.
4. i wanna go roller-blading.
5. i wanna hug/kiss/both someone.anyone.
6. i wanna play in the sand.
7. i wanna get drenched and play in the rain.
8. i wanna dance all night.
9. i wanna finish to #10.
10. i wanna have some me-time.
♥
Tuesday, July 26, 2005
with hatred,to my bestfriend:)it amazes me how a change so little,can make such a big impression on my perception of a person.it amazes me how everyone has changed,ever since we've stepped out of that old junk in old airport road.it amazes me how people treat others ever since then.i've even amazed myself.it pays to be more vain,and i swear by that.i look at people differently these days.we still are the same bunch of people,but with..an edge?i don't know.but i appreciate every single one of you.because however you've affected me(good or bad),it's made me who i am today.and i love me,though not to the extent whereby it's self-admiration.love yourself and it makes it easier to love anyone else.
♥
no plastic smiles.thinking about the very special day,could make me tear right now.i'm overjoyed.overjoyed at the love and care of every single one.i might not have met many,but a simple message from one was good enough.remembering,was good enough.i'm touched.Deeply.i realised how many people actually care.i realised how much i was loved.there no longer are the days whereby,i think as to when my one-winged angel's gonna come.no longer the days of loneliness.no longer days of self-pity.
she's loved.and she couldn't be happier.thank you to all.every single one.
those i met,those well-wishes,
those for just even remembering.
with warmth,love,hugs and kisses..
Love Nis.
♥
Monday, July 25, 2005
she's oh so sassy.
and she's seventeen.
♥
Sunday, July 24, 2005
it's about 3hours and 10minutes before i become
the Queen for the day.smiles widely.everyone,please give me a hug/a kiss/both when you see me.i'm deprived of all that.shall i pen down all my wishes?now now.if you don't intend to give anything,i suggest you close the window now.
the Queen's wants:
1. mp3/zen/ipod
2. pale yellow Rusty tee(from parkway)
3. Rusty blue lanyard(from parkway)
4. more clothes(esp retro/vintage.skirts/tees/pants)
5. shoes/slips
6. more earrings(any kind.chandelier/buttons/hoops etc)
7. matt lipgloss/nude colour lipsticks
8. bouquet of red+white roses/a stalk of any or both
9. you could also give me money to buy the above(yes,nis has no shame)
10. OR,you could just wet me with kisses and warm me with cuddles.
then again,you all have been great.presents would just compliment the year.and notice how the first 5 are expensive shit,whilst the rest are em..cheap-
er.
♥
Tuesday, July 19, 2005
i shall "indulge" in cliche love quotes and TRY to make myself feel oh-so-better.OK?
♥
Monday, July 18, 2005
you wanna be
just friends?FINE.
then
ACT like one.
stop giving me bullshit.
he acted as if he cared,
but all he did was talked.
because when she dared,
he didn't say anything and walked.
sweet nothings spoken.
empty promises taken.thankyou.
THANKYOUVERYMUCH.
♥
Sunday, July 17, 2005
to you:
Do
NOT touch me.
I meant it when i said that to you.Besides my boyfriend and my best friend (who's melvyn m. chong),I do not let any other guy touch me.It goes especially to you.Because you think it's ok and that i'm comfortable with it.Well here's something.I'm
not.I don't have a grudge whatsoever,I just feel uncomfortable.So please,know your limits.Doesn't mean you're a friend,you can "be all comfortable".
on a lighter note,i've been a bit better.Physically.Overall?let's just say i might go into hibernation.and when that day comes,i
might just go out and party my HOT ass off.yes,i just complimented my own arse.it's called "boosting my confidence".so sue me.
♥
Wednesday, July 13, 2005
i ought to get sick often,because everyone misses me more.then again,everyone misses me but ___.i want his cuddles.i want his very lame yet funny jokes.i want his funny acts.i want him.I MISS YOU.and i miss my school friends.and i know you all miss me too,because i heard it from dan.don't worry.i'm coming back tomorrow.heh.yes..she's being child-like happy now.
and alot of things made me happy today.
1. i saw ELMO.he was singing to the tune of jingle bells with only one word,"sky".
2. RETRO was the style today.i dunno why i'm tlling,but this makes me happy.
3.the last 30mins of tuition was a laughing blast.
4. i talked to shaz and nana.
5. mummy bought a delifrance fruit-tart for me (ok.i'm just trying to make it 5).
i'm just feeling goooooooddd today.thought i'm sick.
hold me.
and let your soft lips touch mine.
love me.
and let my heart touch yours.
♥
Sunday, July 10, 2005
i'm sorry we met that day.
i'm sorry i hold your hand that day.
i'm sorry for trying to make you understand.
i'm sorry i care and bothered about you.
i'm sorry for saying those 3words.
i'm sorry for acknowledging your existence.
another comes,
yet all i want is you.
i wish you knew,
this love that's so true.
♥
Friday, July 08, 2005
sometimes a letting go a little helps.
sometimes crying for no reason helps.
sometimes letting your feelings loose helps.
sometimes..
well sometimes,we just have to do things we don't usually do.
i pray you understood every word.
and that finally everything's gonna be ok.
i'll love you.whole-heartedly.
because you're the perfect amount of simplicity.
♥
Wednesday, July 06, 2005
I WILL CRY ALL THE FUCKING TEARS I WANT.
AND I
DON'T NEED A FUCKING REASON FOR IT.
I REPEAT,
I
DON'T NEED A FUCKING REASON.
call me vulnerable.
call me weak.
call me hopeless.
call me a pathetic romatic.
say and do what you want.
BECAUSE I DON'T FUCKING CARE.
I DON'T.
and Boy,i miss you.so badly.
♥
Monday, July 04, 2005
nabeicheebyemuthafuckingbastard.
OK.that was plain "anger management".
i don't know what's up,but i just give up.
tired of bull.tired of thinking.
SIMPLE INDULGENCE is all i want.
but nooooo.everything's so confusing or made confusing.
tsk.FUCK OFF.fuckfuckfuck.
and my head's spinning.ugh.
this is sooo a "rant+rave".
pzyko;
Appreciate is the key word.and yep,goondu friends.
mary ann; there Are onion breads?i'll tell my friend.HAH.and everything WILL go fine,just that right now i'mto tired/lazy to deal with issues.
♥
Sunday, July 03, 2005
Appreciate 5 things before 5 others:
1. Your Youth before Your Old Age
2. Your Health before Your Illness
3. Your Wealth before Your Poverty
4. Your Spare Time before Your Difficult Time
5. Your Life before Your Death
on a lighter note,
the conversation between Fuad and FarhanFarhan:"Mushrooms (and tomatoes) suck."
Fuad:"Mushrooms are nice la."
Farhan:"Onions ward off evil."
Fuad,innocently says:"I thought it was garlic."
Farhan:"They're both the same la.They're both roots."
Fuad:"No,they're not.There's garlic bread,but there isn't onion bread."
Farhan,now defensive:"There is la.One day,I'll show you."
yes,it doesn't really sound very amusing.but i was just VERY amused by fuad's innocence.i laughed so hard.
